As I’ve mentioned many times before, being unemployed screws with your sleeping pattern, it gets to the point where you have no reason to get up in the morning so you stay up late and do whatever, then because you’ve gone to bed so late you wake up later than you normally would.

Because you’ve woken up later than you normally would you’re not tired at the time you fell asleep the night before, so you stay up later. This same pattern repeats until your body clock is totally screwed.

At one point I was going to bed at 8am and waking up at 4-5pm. So while everyone is getting up and getting ready for work, I’m just about to go to bed. Which I do like teasing my friends about just as they’re finishing work and going home to destress I’m just waking up from some badass dream where I’ve been on another planet shooting people with arrows and call them splooge-heads which is really offensive to aliens and I’m not proud of it… (don’t judge me)

I tried really hard to get my sleeping pattern back on track because new jobs tend to get posted mid-afternoon on the website I look at so it’s always best to be one of the first to apply.

I’ve tried many things, having more sleep, having less sleep, even tried staying awake for 24 straight hours which is extremely hard to do when you have nothing to do. All my friends are at work, there’s nothing to watch on television, reading makes me sleepy… it was no good.

I’m at the point now though where my day is totally inverted. Now I’m going to sleep at 2pm and waking up around 9:30pm. I’m having my breakfast at half 10 at night, lunch at about 1 in the afternoon and dinner at around 6 in the morning! How the hell do I get out of THAT pattern?

Someone texted me earlier and I text them back saying “What the fuck are you doing texting me at this time?” to which they responded, “It’s only half 6?”. Yeah well that’s half 6 in the morning according to my body! AGH!

It’s frustrating because you can’t really do anything that this time in the morning, took the dog for a walk yesterday at half 3 in the morning, people would have thought I’m some crazy rapist stalking the streets or something.

Can’t go for a drive with the roof down because it’s night, cold and raining. Mind you recently it’s been cold and raining in the day time so it doesn’t make much difference.

My gym opens at 10am which according to my body clock is 10pm, who goes to the gym at that time? I’m getting ready for bed in a few hours so I haven’t been going to gym much, hense taking the dog for walks for the first time in my life.

What I need is a job, I’d have been starting my new one next week if they didn’t screw up and screw me over. It’s a good job I actually saved some money from my last pay check so I’m not having to dive into the first shitty job I find just to make ends meet.

Though that money’s starting to dissipate with each passing week.

Oh well. Guess I’ll start watching Will and Grace Season 2 and see what tonight (this morning) brings.

..I can’t believe I actually typed that. My excuse is, I don’t watch it for the story, I watch it to perv over Debra Messing, man she is a sexy bitch.

Have fun at work tomorrow everyone mwaha.


Author: 'Ard Pete

Hey everyone, my names Pete, friends call me 'Ard Pete because... well, I'm well 'Ard. Currently in Chesterfield, England, currently working as an I.T. Technical Lead for BT Business and Public Sector; it sounds more glamourous than it is but I'm a dab hand with Microsoft products. I enjoy television, mainly any Star Trek, all of Stargate, Lost, anything Joss Whedon has produced, 24 and House. Favourite music includes; Mumford and Sons, Jason Mraz, Eminem, Chris Cornell, Ludovico Einaudi, Goo Goo Dolls, Muse, 30 Seconds To Mars basically a wide variety of anything that's real, I hate dance, trance and anything like that, I don't consider that to be music. Not much of a sports guy, I like Professional Wrestling, Mixed Martial Arts, Boxing, I can watch Football but only when I'm forced to watch it. Favourite author is Terry Pratchett, favourite film is Armageddon, favourite comedian is Lee Evans, favourite idiot is Karl Pilkington, favourite game is GTAIII, if there's anything else you wish to know, don't hesitate to ask. I'll more than likely not be busy.

18 thoughts on “Inverted”

  1. Man, you’re screwed. No offence, but, jeez, that is one fucked up sleeping pattern. And I’m really offended by ‘splooge-heads’. Like, really offended. You don’t know what you’re saying, dude. And Will and Grace? I don’t care how pert and sprightly and tously-haired is the delighted Ms Messing, the show is a big heap of crap and for the love of God, man, you need to get out of this terrible mess you’ve got yourself into, because that shit is just not cool.
    P.S. Great post 🙂

    1. Dream-state Pete is a racist towards Aliens especially from Omicron Persei 8, I’m not proud of it, it’s a disease 😦

      And yeah Will and Grace is a pile of crap, watching that shit is when you know you’ve hit rock bottom. I think alcohol may be the answer 🙂

          1. There was a time I could have seen that happening to myself except for the fact that I was employed. That was when I played World of Warcraft… I’d frequently stay up FAR too late, only to go into work running on 3 hours of sleep.

            The only answer I could give you is video games. Find a great one, and play the bajesus out of it.

            1. I’ve never played World of Warcraft myself, mainly because I don’t have a suitable computer that’d run it the way I want it to but it’s just aswell because it’s exactly the type of game I’d get hooked to. I used to be hooked on Runescape before I got bored of it. Running on 3 hours sleep is only acceptable when you’ve been out drinking the night before 😛

  2. Ugh that happened to me one Christmas break when I came home from England. I was so depressed after my study abroad was over. I didn’t correct my jetlag, so I was doing the same as you–waking up at night and going to sleep in the morning. It’s so weird! Never again!

    1. I’m trying to correct myself as we speak (that sounds weird but you know what I mean) I only have to last another 4 hours then I can finally go to sleep!

  3. I love Will and Grace. Karen and Jackie crack me up. So ridiculous.

    I think they say when you get jet lagged and your body clock gets thrown off, make sure you keep the lights on during the day and at night, get the room dark. Pretty soon your body will adjust to the light schedule — something like that?

    If that doesn’t work I’ll come over and sing you a lullaby. ZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZzzzzz

    1. Ah that doesn’t work for me, I’ll just fall asleep in the light, I’m a natural night owl so I think my body prefers it! But, I managed to stay awake until 8pm and have just woke up at 4am so that’s more or less back on the right track right!?

  4. My (unemployed) roommate and my (unemployed) self just had this conversation this morning. We’ve been waking up around noon and writing the most mundane to do lists to make ourselves feel “normal”. Unfortunately “let breakfast digest while watching the animal channel” isn’t exactly a normal persons idea of productivity. I hear you!

    1. Seems perfectly valid to me, what are you gonna do? Walk around doing things with an undigested breakfast causing stomach cramps and general discomfort?

      I’ll take a pass on that one! 🙂

  5. Ah, crap, I left a nested comment in a comment thread that had nothing to do with what I was saying. It’s 11:45 pm here which is 11:46 pm as far as my body knows. I’m tired.

  6. Goddamn, this sounds rough. Have to say that having breakfast at tea-time is sometimes the most awesome thing that can ever happen however. Any time where you can stuff toast in your face is an excellent time.

    In other news, I worked out today that my hourly wage at my workplace is less than the wage I was earning at ASDA. Hours are more steady and I do earn a salary, but cut down to the hourly rate… I’ve taken a step DOWN from ASDA. It’s no wonder I have no money! Occassionally having no job is preferable to having to go to work. Today was one of those days.

    I hope you’re good 🙂

    1. I’ve just about managed to sort my self out sleep wise now, it’s alot better sleeping at night than it is in the day!

      If you have to get a second job you’ll have to see if you can get a part-time job back at ASDA! Sorry you’ve had a bad day at work, I have an interview monday for some broadband company in their tech support department, it’s just a shame I know nothing about the technical aspects of broadband, I need to do some learning before Monday as I have to do a test apparently! They should just give me a job!

      1. Good luck Pete! I’m sure you’ll be fine though, I didn’t know owt about videoconferencing before I started. Just do a bit of revision, and I’m sure you’ll walk it 🙂 Let me know how it goes!

        1. I just need to look up some shit on the net which I haven’t done yet, no doubt I’ll do well, it’d be my luck I’d get a job in a city I don’t want to live in for a company that doesn’t even have parking. FML.

          Then yesterday I have a BBQ at the Fortress of Arditude, my friend drops her wedding and engagement rings in the decking so we had to rip it up, then a cat pooed on my bed for the second time in a month! AGH!

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