Attempt Number 2

In Case You Didn't Know What Colours Were, They're Labelled.
In Case You Didn’t Know What Colours Were, They’re Labelled.

A few years ago I attempted to quit smoking; the only reason I would even do such a thing is not because of health risks and don’t get me wrong, I f’n love smoking. So what if it makes your breath smell? That’s why I always carry around a pack of chewing gum so I’m always minty fresh. So what if it makes your clothes smell? I always carry a little bottle of aftershave so I always smell well fit. No the reason I decided to give up smoking was because I joked about it on a Facebook status once and was basically met with a barrage of “LOL WHATEVS TREVS! U NEVAR QUIT SMOKIN!” type of comments.

So I thought, “Screw you, I can quit smoking if I want.” And so that is what I did. I smoked my last cigarette that day; I took my time with it, enjoyed it, savoured it and then that was that. I stopped. I picked up some nicotine patches and tried them on for size, I remember them making me really tired so I fell asleep. I then woke up feeling extremely dizzy and the patch had given my arm a rash so threw the patch in the bin and decided to go cold turkey instead.

What followed on from that moment was probably the worst time of my life; I remember being in an extremely bad mood for a long time. Snapping at people uncontrollably for even the slightest of things and trust me when you work at a hotel that’s not a good thing. I remember threatening to knock out a guest that was being a right dick. Making female staff members cry because they hadn’t completed their shift properly. I was on all accounts a right knob head.

But luckily they all understood; quitting smoking is a hard thing to do and anyone that even attempts it even if it only lasts a day gets my respect. It takes a great deal of will power; my mother smoked for 30 odd years before she decided to quit, she used the patches and gradually cut the dosage down, she hasn’t had a cigarette since.

It went well for a time, I started going to the gym aswell to release the frustration of not being able to smoke; I lost quite a bit of weight in that time.

A lot of it is boredom, if you’re bored you go for a cigarette or if you have regular breaks at work it’s just habit of going outside and smoking, or if you’re on a night out and surrounded by friends that smoke. I managed to break that habit and stop completely.

Then of course my personal life turned to hell, this girl who spent weeks messing with my mind actually went and broke old ‘Ard Pete’s heart and I got the sudden urge to go and buy some cigarettes and unfortunately I caved in to that urge. Sure I was disappointed with myself but I also felt so much better. The craving never went away that entire four months and from that moment I had eventually built myself back up to being a regular smoker again.

Cut to 2013 and at work there’s a new craze. e-Cigarettes they’re called; electronic cigarettes that you charge up via USB and you fill it with this “juice” of various flavours. You press the button and inhale like a real cigarette and exhale water vapour. They’re not a new invention, they’ve been around for awhile; my auntie has one that looks like a real cigarette and she hasn’t touched a real one since.

This guy at work was the first to buy one, he was a 20 a day man (I’m at most, 10). He hasn’t touched a real cigarette since and it costs him about £5 a week on refills.

Now everyones buying them so I thought I’d jump on the band wagon and get one too. The actual thing costs about £25, battery lasts about 5 days, comes with a charger and some “juice” which is actually flavoured nicotine liquid. You pour the liquid into the e-Cigarette; charge up the device then push the button and inhale.

Whether it’s any good or not remains to be seen, the people I know that have used them seem to be happier with it so I have hopes. This way I should be saving my self many moneys that can be spent on more important things such as alcohol and bitches.

So let’s see how quitting smoking attempt number 2 goes!


Author: 'Ard Pete

Hey everyone, my names Pete, friends call me 'Ard Pete because... well, I'm well 'Ard. Currently in Chesterfield, England, currently working as an I.T. Technical Lead for BT Business and Public Sector; it sounds more glamourous than it is but I'm a dab hand with Microsoft products. I enjoy television, mainly any Star Trek, all of Stargate, Lost, anything Joss Whedon has produced, 24 and House. Favourite music includes; Mumford and Sons, Jason Mraz, Eminem, Chris Cornell, Ludovico Einaudi, Goo Goo Dolls, Muse, 30 Seconds To Mars basically a wide variety of anything that's real, I hate dance, trance and anything like that, I don't consider that to be music. Not much of a sports guy, I like Professional Wrestling, Mixed Martial Arts, Boxing, I can watch Football but only when I'm forced to watch it. Favourite author is Terry Pratchett, favourite film is Armageddon, favourite comedian is Lee Evans, favourite idiot is Karl Pilkington, favourite game is GTAIII, if there's anything else you wish to know, don't hesitate to ask. I'll more than likely not be busy.

7 thoughts on “Attempt Number 2”

  1. Quitting smoking is a hard thing to do, so bravo for not quitting on quitting 😀
    Paul smoked sooo much when we lived in England. It’s more common to smoke there I feel. Over in the states and Canada I don’t see half as many people smoking as I did in England. Paul went cold turkey and never looked back. So crazy. My brother had one of those e cigarettes and he really liked it. But he only smoked for a year so what did he know?

    1. Definitely, England is the sort of place that makes you want to give yourself some sort of smoking related disease just to get through the day. Good on him for going cold turkey, it’s definitely the hardest way to quit.

      Haha your brother only smoked for a year, it’s hard to believe I’ve been at it 11 years :S How have I not died already?

  2. I knew I would never smoke when years ago my dad started sneezing/coughing at the same time then followed it up with an “awww shit!” at the end. He actually did it the last time I saw him. If you don’t want your kids to do something, do it yourself.

    Electronic cigarettes should help. I have a friend who used them and he seemed generally healthier. Best of luck. Keep us updated.

    1. A sneeze/cough :\ I can say in the ten years I’ve been smoking I’ve never done that! The only thing that makes it hard using electronic cigs is the fact that they keep breaking whenever I try to fill it up; it’s currently broken at the moment so I’m currently going cold turkey which is fine because I didn’t smoke much when I was at home anyway however being at work tomorrow is going to be a different story.

  3. Do it Pete!! I’m proud of you for making the commitment. Of course now that I’ve gotten to this post late you might have already started back up again. LOL! But no, I don’t think you did. Like Addie said, your ‘Ard Pete, you can do anything! We all believe in you. xoxo

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