PridePeople that have known me for some years know that it’s pretty common knowledge that I have in my life so far had a lot of jobs. I know people that have had just as many, people that may have only had one or two. How many in total have I had? Not even I know that answer as some of them don’t even appear on my CV.

I’ve mentioned previously that I tend to get bored easily at what I’m doing and then I start to piss around, subconsciously trying to self sabotage myself which results in me having to find new work either by my choice or theirs. I put it down to the fact that I just didn’t know what I wanted to do in life.

I originally started out as a cleaner at Chesterfield College before moving onto a full time job at a horrific paperboard packaging company; eventually leaving there and working in an electronics factory. From there I’ve done data entry, glass packing, I was a gardener at a covenant, hotel receptionist, outbound sales, kitchen porter in France, customer service advisor and even door to door sales for about four days.

A lot of them have been temporary jobs just to get me by until the next opportunity came along and it wasn’t that I was really all that bad at work; in fact in most cases I excelled at everything I did. Having such a wide variety of job roles over the years has given me the ability to pick things up quickly. And while I tried my best in everything I did; the only thing I haven’t gotten from any of those is pride. Continue reading “Pride”


Trading Standards

If there’s one phrase that pisses me off more than anything it’s “I’ll go to Trading Standards.”

Working in customer service you hear that alot, especially in the retail trade. When I worked for Dixons doing customer service for Currys and PC World I would that all that time, at least three times a day.

Usually it’s probably because the company had screwed the customer over and they had every right to complain because Dixons is a piss poor company both to work for and to buy from.

For those who don’t know Trading Standards are departments in local authorities like county councils and whatnot that investigate problems people are having from companies, like say, if someone is in their rights to have a refund and provides a receipt and we then say no, the customer can call Trading Standards and they can either advise us to do the right thing or enforce legal action.
Continue reading “Trading Standards”

Winds Of Change


Today was kind of a big day at work. Following up from yesterdays statement that the company I work for had been sold (For the second time in a year no less) the new joint owners, the former owner, the financial director and the operations director had every department in their boardroom today separately for a little discussion on what things had gone wrong and what could be done.

Meanwhile I was in no mood for any shit today, considering I woke up to a text message from my best friend at work Michelle only to say that she’s leaving at the end of the month because she can’t concentrate on passing her exams for her degree while she’s working here.

She had already cut her hours back by eliminating working Friday (which I have to do, meaning this week I’ll be working a total of 59.5 hours). Needless to say my heart was in my throat reading that. I couldn’t be more gutted, we were so close in school and for us to be reunited at a new job was almost like a dream come true. Continue reading “Winds Of Change”

The Head Office

If Only I worked In A Head Office Like This...

On my one day off I’ve done nothing but sleep today it seems. Wednesday on my first 12 and a half hour shift I was stressed, I had 8 orders I needed to be sent out that day, three other items that I needed to get sent out that were physically on my desk and countless orders to chase.

Needless to say it was a very stressful day at the office that day. There was much shouting coming from my mouth and when I shout, people listen due to the “booming voice” that I have. I’m like a white Barry White.

Thursday I was given the day off (and I was still busy that day) which I didn’t want because I wanted to work with Michelle, she only does three days a week and we work well as a team when she’s in. But alas I wasn’t there, she had a terrible day and told me that she wants to quit and go elsewhere. I convinced her to stay. Then Friday it was another 12 and a half hour shift and I was left with all the work Michelle didn’t complete the day before because she wasn’t getting the support she needed from the new manager.

So I have a stack of paper an inch thick to wade through as soon as I got in. I didn’t even have the energy to get stressed. My manager asked me what was wrong and my reply was, “I’m just… broken.” Continue reading “The Head Office”


Random photo of me being 'Ard

Sorry for my absense this entire week, it’s already Friday and it only seems like it was five minutes ago since I was getting back from London. This week has been mental at work, rather than having a day unpaid I decided to work an extra day this week and I’ve swapped Saturday for Sunday due to going to see Noel Gallagher Sunday. So that’s six straight days, at least there’s only one more day left!

So much stuff has gone down in such a short amount of time it’s unreal. Basically my manager has gotten a new job elsewhere which is a shame because he was a guy that always made you laugh and calmed you down when you were angry. But of course if you can find a higher paying job then you should go for it. So he’s going the middle of next week.

Which of course makes his Customer Care Manager the new sales and e-commerce manager meaning at some point I’ll undoubtedly become the new Customer Care Manager and they’ve been trying to speed train me on everything. And I’ve been trying to pick it up as quick as possible because the customer care manager, while being great with customers isn’t all that great with his colleagues as he’s often snappy when any of us ask him something. Continue reading “…Promotion?”


So after spending a couple of weeks looking for work I have finally started to get responses. Although not many, I filled out an application form for CPP yesterday or the day before as it’s half 3 in the morning now. CPP is a call centre in Chesterfield, customers call to activate their brand new credit card then once you’ve done that you have to read out some prepared script and try and sell them card protection. CPP = Card Protection Plan.

If they say no, fine you hang up and go for the next one. I’ve applied for this job twice before, the first time I didn’t have any call centre or customer service experience so I didn’t get it and at that point I was still shit in interviews. The second time I was through to the final stages, the interviewer was really impressed with me. Then something happened with the company, think they lost a contract with someone or something and they halted their recruitment process. Never heard back from them again and to be honest I wasn’t all that bothered.

I don’t know why I filled out an application form. I think it’s because I saw my bank account and thought, “Shit, apply for everything.”
Continue reading “Responses!”

Where Do We Go Now?

Today’s title brought to you by the band, Kane.

Basically, I’m at a loss, this week (and last week) I have done nothing, and I mean nothing. I have been looking for jobs and whatnot but the problem is I don’t know what I want to do, after this year I know what I don’t want to do and that’s work in a damn call centre.

Started the year working in Dixon’s doing customer service for Currys and PC World customers, in the extended warranties department, it was absolute hell, call after call after call of idiots wanting to complain about anything. “I threw my keys and have scratched my fridge, do I get a new one?” I’m being serious, someone actually asked that. Lost my temper with one customer, Continue reading “Where Do We Go Now?”

Fractured Mind

This weekend has basically been spent doing nothing, mostly because I need to not spend my money on alcohol every weekend, not until I get out of debt at least but it’s also because I didn’t have the drive to do anything, I have had a feeling of impending doom. I just want this coming week to be over with.

Tuesday I have my dreaded three-month review, I did very well in my 6 week review but that was because my manager loved me, I was her golden boy but now she’s gone and now I’m left with people who don’t think I’m special, I’m just some moody fucker that sits at my desk waiting for the day to end. The reason for my bad mood is the decreasing amount of nicotine entering my body and having to listen to the stupid noises that prick continuously makes.

I’ve been reassured by work mates that I’ll be fine, my review is at 10:30am Tuesday, they said they don’t sack people at the beginning of the day, if they were going to get rid of me they’d wait until last-minute, like this other guy, they moved his review from 10am to 4:30pm and basically told him he wasn’t needed anymore.
Continue reading “Fractured Mind”

The Bum Doctors II: Return Of The Anal Probe + Victorious

The reason this blog has two titles is because it’s essentially two separate blogs merged into one, rather than having to create two different posts.

As I’ve mentioned before today was the follow-up appointment with the doctor about my piles, after they seemed to come off last time I was still feeling pain in my anal region so I thought I’d better go back rather than suffering. I was pretty angry that the treatment hadn’t worked the first time considering the amount of pain I had to go through and the inconvenience suffered afterwards.

So back in the hospital ward, on time for my appointment, the doctor kept me waiting for 30 minutes before I was called in, I dropped my pants behind the screen and covered myself with a sheet, the doctor comes in and asks me what’s been happening, I said I was still feeling pain, although there hasn’t been any bleeding since the large amount I shit out the first time.

He said the blood loss was normal as the piles are filled with blood and it was just that escaping, but the pain I was getting now didn’t sound like piles, it did feel like a different sort of pain too actually… so again I took the position, turned on my left side with my knees bent and he inspected my arse.

“Does this hurt?” He says.

Continue reading “The Bum Doctors II: Return Of The Anal Probe + Victorious”

No Pain, No Gain

Thought I’d keep you all updated on how I’m getting on with the gyming, I had a week off when I smashed open my head on that damn sign and then a few more days off when I got raped by that psychopathic doctor but now I’m back into the full swing of things, little did I know one of my clique goes to the gym, Ray’s been going since March, never even told me! Or he did and I just forgot but recently I’ve been going with him and as he’s slimmer and buffer than I am I’ve been doing what he’s doing.

Obviously he’s stronger than I am because he’s more in shape and comes regularly (I can still beat him in an arm wrestle though so that’s why I’m the top dog). Went down on my own Tuesday and Wednesday, worked on my cardio mostly then did a few weights, Thursday I met Ray at the gym, didn’t do much cardio as I over did it the past couple of days and my problematic left knee started acting up so pretty much did weights. Worked on the back and biceps Thursday, had Friday off because my arms were dead, it wasn’t so painful that I couldn’t bend my arms like last time but it was still pretty achy, but it felt good because you know your arms are working.

Pushing myself to the point where I just can’t do it anymore, if you get out that one extra rep you know you can’t do without REALLY trying then you know you’re building some muscle to those bad boys. After we were done on the weights we went for a swim, I don’t like walking around in just shorts in public really, I try my hardest to breath in so people don’t think I’m as fat as I actually am hah. As do all men I suspect. After the swim in was sauna time where we had a 15 minute sweating contest, one which I think ended in a draw.

Then to top it off we had a 20 minute chill in the jacuzzi, not really working out anything there apart from your eyes as you watch the hot ladies get their swim on. Continue reading “No Pain, No Gain”